Its That Time of Year Again!

In one month, my big brother will be graduating from UNC-Wilmington, and in two months my little brother will be graduating high school and my sister will be finishing up her last few days of elementary school. It's this time of year that makes me feel really old! I can't believe how quickly this year has flown by, and how much God has worked in my life! Right after my big brother graduates, I'll be jetting off to Norway for a class I'm taking at Wingate. I'm really excited to be going out of the country again, it seems like Costa Rica was a lot longer than two years ago! I'm really excited to see a country with so much natural beauty and be able to take it all in through the stuff our teacher has planned! Two days after I return, I'll be headed to Williamsburg, Virginia to be a SummerShiner for the third year in a row! I'm excited to work with 13 other Christians serving the campers that come by for a taste of colonial times! In all the craziness of life, I keep Nehemiah 8:10 posted at my desk "The JOY of the Lord is my strength," and truly He is the one that keeps me going and gives me energy!

Through Thick and Thin

This school year, especially this semester has been the toughest time in my life, yet it's been when I have sensed God the most. Through everything that has happened, I can see where He was preparing me for each step that He planned for me to take. It's so amazing to see Him at work in my life and the lives of those around me! The friends that have stood by me through thick and thin will be friends for life, I'm more sure of it now than ever! With everything that has happened this year, I'm feeling more prepared than I ever would have thought possible for this summer. I reapplied to be a part of SummerShine again this summer, and I found out just a few weeks ago that I'll be serving God in beautiful Mt. Rushmore this summer! I'm so excited to see what's in store for the summer, and know God is going to do big things!

This verse from The Message has helped me though and has become one of my new life verses:

"Be strong. Take courage. Don't be intimidated. Don't give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He's right there with you. He won't let you down; he won't leave you." -Deuteronomy 31:6

God's going to be all over Mt. Rushmore this summer, I can hardly wait!!

The end is so near

Actually it's tomorrow...just over 12 hours from now.

After 12 weeks of being in Cherokee, my time here is coming to an end. I never thought i'd see the day, because three months feels like eternity, but i'm finally done. Today was my last day of work, and my mind still tells me that i'll be in there tomorrow renting tubes and booking tours, when in reality my body will be in the car headed for Greensboro. In retrospect, this summer has flown by, but I promise the weeks got longer the more time I spent on the campground. God has really blessed me with everything that happened this summer, both good and bad. He's taught me a lot about who I am and who He should be in my life. I've met some really amazing people that I hope I will be friends with for a very long time, because they taught me how much God truely cares about me and wants to have a relationship with me. I've been quite blessed to have spent my summer with such amazing people! Although many of them are gone and have been for about a week or so, I can't seem to wrap my mind that it's going to be a long while till I see many of them again. For some reason, I keep expecting them to just walk right in the door and start talking like they were never gone. I'm really ready to go home, but I also wish that this summer hadn't gone by so quickly.

While it's sad to leave, I'm so excited to be going home! There are so many of my friends that I feel like I haven't seen in forever that I will get to see while I'm home, and I'll get to spend a little time with my family before I have to leave again for school. I'm so excited about going back to school, I just saw pictures of what my apartment looks like and I honestly couldn't be happier! It still needs some decorating and a few touches here and there, but i'm so ready to move in!! It's going to be nice having a set schedule that doesn't change from week to week.

It's kinda bitter-sweet, but I guess it had to end sometime...

ALL of Me

Last night I finished reading Hadassah: One Night With the King, a fictional book that adds to the Biblical story of Esther. I got to a point in the book where I didn't want to put it down because the story was so interesting. I've always been a fan of the story of Esther, but the book gave a new light to her courage and internal beauty. Although it is fiction and probably not completely accurate, it gave me a lot to think about. I've always wondered what must have been going through her head during everything that she went through and reading the author's opinion made me feel more normal. There are many times that I forget to go to God first with my problems, and the story painted Esther with struggling with that same thing.

So far over the summer I've realized that God is the only one who can give me strength when there are tough customers that i have to deal with. It's taken me a long time to realize that I was still holding on to parts of my life and hadn't given everything completely to God. We had a guest speaker in Bible study a few weeks ago, and he spoke about how if we hold on to just 1% of our lives, that little part means that we really have given nothing to Him. 99% isn't enough to give to God, I need to give Him all of me, because that's all He wants from me. I've had a lot of time to think about what areas of my life I haven't given up completely, and I've slowly been fixing those areas. I'm still far from where I need to be, but I've never felt closer to Him than I have this summer and I absolutely love it!!

One day at a time

I arrived on the Cherokee campground today at about 3pm. It was about a 4 hour drive, but it went a lot quicker than I thought it would. I didn't do much but get unloaded and go on a golf cart tour of the campground. It's a lot bigger than I imagined, but I guess that's a good thing, because there is a lot to do. I'll try to take pictures on my first day off, but I don't know when that will be for sure yet. Tomorrow I start work, and I've been told that I should be working in the tour center. It's basically a job where I will sit inside a little hut thing and rent intertubes and book people for tours to different places around Cherokee. It should be fun, but i'm ready to check it out for myself. The cabin that we are staying in is also a little smaller than I figured, but it should be manageable for the summer.
For dinner tonight, we went to the church that our activities director is a youth paster at. We sang a few songs with their congregation, then had a potluck dinner for a man that just returned from jail. It was really cool to get to meet some people from the community, and the food was AMAZING!!!
We walked to the adult center when we got back to the campground and some of the other summershiners are playing risk. Allison and I walked outside and are sitting on the porch with our computers. It's a really nice night, and i'll be really happy if it stays this cool!

It's here...

...and I'm scared out of my mind.
The trip that I will make tomorrow is going to be completely out of my comfort zone, and there is no way that I could do it without God. Tomorrow morning sometime, I will be leaving to spend 12 weeks of this summer in Cherokee, NC. I've talked about it before, but it's finally here. I'm really excited, don't get me wrong, but I have no clue what to expect or even what to pack. My mom is driving up with me, so if i take too much, she can always bring some of it back for me. I'm still really nervous about what will happen tomorrow as i give myself up to God and let Him take control of my summer! I'm sure it's going to be amazing, but i hope my nerves don't get the best of me first.
Please pray that God will use me to impact the lives of many people over this summer, and that I will completely rely on Him for all my needs and worries.

I will go, I will go, I will go, Lord send me...

I was going to go to bed early tonight, but seeing as a fire alarm kept my whole building outside for at least 30 minutes, I'm wide awake now...

I was quite scared about this weekend, and I probably prayed at least half way there. God does answer prayers, and He worked quickly for me this weekend! I don't know what I was so worried about. I got there and felt a little out of place at the beginning, because everyone was talking with their groups for the summer, and people kept asking me where I was going to be working. Even though I was meeting people left and right and I was in a room completely full of people, I felt alone. Someone encouraged me a little when they said that because I was there, I had a better chance of getting a spot than someone who didn't show up. That made me feel a little more confidant that I was actually there for a reason, but it didn't completely calm my nerves.

We listened to several encouraging speakers, and about 9 people started heading off to stay with the families that had given up space in their homes. I was talking to some people that I had met from State, but they left not long after the first few people went. I started talking to a girl that had flown from California to come for training, and she completely eased all my stress. She was telling me all about SummerShine and how much fun it is. I talked to her about most of the stuff I was worried about, and she explained how she got involved last year.

I was placed with a high school girl that was assigned to work at the Cherokee KOA this summer and we were assigned to stay with a really sweet couple who promised to come visit both of us. We stayed up till almost midnight talking to them and hearing the really cute story of how they met. The next morning they had breakfast all set up for us and we got a chance to talk to them some more while we were eating.

We got back to the church around 9:30 and had several more speakers before lunch. The director told a story about how a bird tried to fly in his glass door at home, but ran into it instead. He said we should make sure we fly through the doors that God opens for us, instead of those which we want to enter, because it won't work unless the door has already been opened. When lunch was ready, the director said he needed to talk to a few people and named off a few names. My name was one of them and my stomach literally flipped. Everyone was dismissed by where they were going, so that they could eat and get to know the people they were going to be working with over the summer. I was left in the room with a couple of other girls that didn't know where they were going to be either. The director's daughter came and talked to us about how we might be subs, because there were just so many girls that wanted to work and not enough places to put them. I started to panic, because I didn't know why they had called my name and figured the worst. After she was done talking, I went to go talk to her dad in the other room and he handed me an envelope. He said they had a spot open at Cherokee and wanted me to join the team there! I was quite ecstatic, because I had pretty much figured that I wasn't going to have a spot.

The weekend only got better from there! I got to meet the other people that I will be working with, and had many questions answered that have really put me to ease about this summer. I truly feel a peace about it, and can't wait for it to actually start! I'm definitely going to miss my friends and family, and probably my phone and Internet access, but I know I'm going to grow as a person and as a Christian. It's a wonderful experience, and I can't wait to make the most of it!

The title of this is from a song by Starfield that we sang at church on Sunday morning. It's been stuck in my head all day, and I absolutely love it!

And it begins...

This weekend marks the beginning of a giant leap outside my comfort zone, and i'm scared out of my mind :/

Its time for SummerShine orientation, and the only thing I know is where I am supposed to go. I don't really like going somewhere that I am not completely prepared for. I like to know what I will be doing, and who will be there. Unfortunately, I don't know either. I'm headed to a Methodist church in Clemmons, and I don't know a soul that will be there. I don't even know which campground I will be working at yet. I'm going to a new place and hopefully going to meet some new people...

I'm so glad my Heavenly Father will be with me, because this so isn't me...

Good News

I was home for Easter break Thursday through Monday. It was great to be home with my family, and good to see many of my friends. Unfortunately, I had food poisoning all day Friday, so I didn't get to see several of my friends and had to stay home.

Nothing really exciting happened while I was home. I spent a lot of time with my family, and got a lot of sleep! :) My mom did loose our Easter candy and she spent several hours looking all over the house for it, only to find it around 4 o'clock in one of her regular hiding spots in the kitchen.

On Monday, I was all packed and ready to head back to school at about 2:30, but my mom had the van so I couldn't leave. She called me at about 3 and said that she was washing the windshield and realized that I was well past the inspection date and she volunteered to take it in right then. While she was busy with that, I took her car and went to visit my dad at work. I'm ashamed to say that I probably haven't been to his office in a while, because there were many things that looked new and his office was not where I remembered it being (he told me he switched offices about a year ago! whoops). I was talking to him about several different things, and my summer plans came up. I still hadn't heard from SummerShine at the time, so he got on their website and called the contact number that was there. The woman that answered the phone said that I was on the waiting list and she would call me in the next few days when she found out whether she had a spot for me or not. My dad told me to start looking for other places to work, because he figured that I wasn't the only one on the waiting list. I prayed for knowledge and guidance as to what I should do this summer, since the job I had been eagerly anticipating seemed to be falling through.

Well, my prayers were answered when the lady that my dad talked to called me today during my Spanish class... I called her back and she said she would probably have a spot for me (if I was still interested), but she didn't know where yet because she needed to get in contact with the people that she hadn't heard a definite yes from. She told me to keep my schedule free for this weekend so that I can attend the orientation in Winston Salem. It's in God's hands now, and if it isn't the right opportunity for me, He will close the door. It will be hard if I end up not having the job, but He will help me through!

A Whirlwind Week

Boy am I glad that last week is over and done with!

I was home for a little less than 24 hours on Wednesday/Thursday and didn't see any of my family members in the flesh, but talked to them all over the phone. It was good to see many of my friends from home, but I wish it had been under different circumstances...

I got back on Thursday afternoon and really didn't feel like doing anything. I was in a daze during my classes, and very glad I didn't have tests in either one of them. I was planning on getting dinner from the Klondike then hiding in my room to collect all the thoughts that were running through my head. Little did I know, God had other plans for me! I got a text message from a friend, and he asked me if I was interested in going to the Chris Tomlin concert. He said the people he was going with won tickets on the radio (so they were free) and that they had an extra. About 10 minutes after I said I would go, we were getting in the car and headed for Charlotte. The concert was absolutely AMAZING, and I needed so badly to hear so many of the words that Chris Tomlin sang. It really pulled me out of my icky mood and showed me that I need to trust God with ALL things.

Two of my classes were cancelled on Friday, so I started reading Redeeming Love. I got it while I was in Greensboro, and little did I know that again, it was exactly what I needed. But I'm not saying anything about it, because it's one of those books that you just have to read for yourself... Thankfully I finished it yesterday, because it would have definitely distracted me from the homework that I really should be doing now... Oh well!

On Sunday, I decided to go to the church where my Uncle is the pastor. It's not too far away from school, and one of the people that I went to the Chris Tomlin concert with goes there regularly, so I figured I would give it a chance since I'd never been. I got to see my Uncle and his family, which was really nice because I hadn't seen them since Thanksgiving. It was a really good service, and (again) just the encouragement that I needed!

UNC won last night! The week keeps getting better and better!

Today was the day. A few weeks ago, we had to turn in our housing forms for next year, and decide who we wanted to live in the apartments with. The housing department notified us on Friday that we could pick out the exact apartment that we wanted today at 2:30. It turned out that my group was the first on the list, and we had any pick that we wanted from the 2 available apartment buildings. We knew exactly the one that we wanted, and because we were first, we got it!!! They are still being built, so we'll be the first to live in it!!
I signed up for classes last week, so next semester feels like it's so close!!

Thursday will hopefully be our first intramural softball game. I got coaxed into being on a coed team a few weeks ago, and our first game was supposed to be last week, but it got cancelled because of the rain. I have to stay and go home a little later than I would if we didn't have the game, but it's all right.

Oh, and this week is a short week! We get Friday and Monday off for Easter! I'm so ready to be home and see my family and friends!!

I still haven't heard anything about either summer position that I applied for, but God is teaching me patience, which I don't have a very good track record with!

It doesn't always have to make sense at the moment...

It's amazing how God seems to prepare us for things that are about to come.

That walk I spoke of last post, brought me a lot closer to an extremely godly girl that I was able to run to when I needed someone to talk to. She knew exactaly what to say to make me feel better, and gave me a list of verses to help me further.

Psalm 34:18
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are curshed in spirit."

That verse was in my Bible study homework at the beginning of the week, and it really didn't hit me till now. I was reading through Psalms looking for something that would somehow make me feel better, and by the grace of God stumbled across Psalm 62:

"1My soul finds rest in God alone...5Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him."

Thank goodness for iTunes. I set it to shuffle through my Christian music, and it was also exactally what I needed, right when I needed it:
You are my Joy -David Crowder Band
Fill My Cup -Paul Colman
Landslide of Love -Newsboys
Remember Me -Mark Schultz
Name Above All Names -Newsboys
All I Can Do -Jump5
Camouflage -Plus One
Cloud of Witnesses -Mark Schultz
Irene -TobyMac
I Have Been There -Mark Schultz
O.O. Baby -Stacie Orrico
The Orphan -Newsboys
When You Go Home -Mark Schultz
Who You Are -Caedmon's Call

It had the right amount of upbeat songs, and songs that really give me a new perspective on the whole situation.

When I returned a call just a little while ago, I could never guess what I was about to be informed. God had been preparing me for it. He's looking out for me, and is the only one that can truely take care of me.

He may not be there when I go over to her house any more, but he's in a much better place with the Father. He has no pain and God is taking complete care of him. God took him, because it was his time, and when better than doing what he loved while with his friends.

What God decides doesn't always make sense at the time, but it's all for a reason. It's going to be rough for all that knew him, but something good will come out of the situation.

He's in a better place, but we'll miss him here.

*M.O.* See you in heaven!!

Footsteps in the right direction

It's amazing how being obedient in one little thing can completely change your mood. Call me crazy, but ever since I hit the "send" button on my SummerShine application, my days have gotten considerably better. It wasn't really an immediate weight lifted off my shoulders, but it's slowly eased its way down. As I sit by my computer waiting to hear back from either the Elks or from SummerShine, I've done a lot of thinking. Would God have put me here if He didn't have a good reason? Who am I to question what He's got planned? Why do I worry so much? Good grief I have so many questions...

Oddly enough, I can't get "You are my joy, You are my joy, You are my JOY" out of my head. It's a great song, and I kept singing it over and over again while I was in the shower today. Maybe it's God's way of showing me that I can be happy, and that I don't have to constantly question Him. I'm working on that still...

In the brief moments of beautiful weather we had at the beginning of the week, my friend and I decided to take a walk. It started out as just a way to get a little exercise without having to actually go to the gym. We ended up walking on the roads that go around the school for over an hour and a half. I learned a lot about her, and feel a lot closer to her now. As I was thinking about it, I realized God's showing Himself there too. I had been feeling like most of my good friends are at home, and then He points out that I have really great friends here too. I just love HIM!!! He can make a good day even better, and pull me out of the deepest wells of self pity. He is AMAZING!

I do still miss being home, but I'm not really dreading this weekend as much as I thought I would be. It's only 2 days away, and I haven't really considered going home. God's really given me a peace about staying on campus, which I didn't think would happen at all. I'm actually thinking that I will be able to survive the last 22 days of class. (Crazy huh? The year seems to have flown by!) I'm not really off the hook for learning till May 24th when I get back from Mexico, but the more I learn about what exactly we will be doing there, the more it becomes the beast that I will tackle when it arrives at my doorstep. I am excited about it, but it's definitely going to be different than I originally thought... Oh well, God will help me through it all! Thank goodness God can handle everything in the way that is best!

I'm finally my happy self again :)